In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
