i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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