Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize