I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize