Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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