giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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