If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I could make wine with my vomit
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
