24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
