I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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