Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Its not alright that i make out with a manican.

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(224): View more from Illinois

I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.

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(845): View more from New York

Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.

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(562): View more from California

I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service

(562): View more from California

And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.

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(936): View more from Texas

If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.

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(989): View more from Michigan

Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.

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(734): View more from Michigan

lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon

(810): View more from Michigan

what a trade!

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