Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
