We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
