So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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