I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
What a dumb baby whore.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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