but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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