I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
