the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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