Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
