ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
