Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
