So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize