everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
