didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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