He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize