Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
