fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
