I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
