I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
