he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
