i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i think i have herpe
just one?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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