btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
