Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
