I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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