Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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