don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
