Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
