Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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