I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
