i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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