Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I can't put those talents on a resume
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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