alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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