Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
