Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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