Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
There's even glitter on my cock...
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