Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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