i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
