There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize