Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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