Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
