u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
