You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Randomize
